Statistics!

I wish I had something better to talk about, but honestly my life at the moment revolves around learning and working so it doesn't leave a lot else to the imagination. Yesterday I went up to the mines for my new job- just to feel the place out and get dirty. It was fun, I met two great girls and had a really good time.

As usual, in my situation, the topic turned to marriage. I'm reading 'Committed' at the moment so marriage is on my mind. I love the theory behind marriage. I love the progression of the union and the unrealistic ideal we as modern society has built for a tradition which has typically been regarding as inhuman for hundreds of thousands of years. This book has made me question; why do I want to get married? I often tell people I prefer my boyfriends name to my own and thats a big reason why, also I don't want a different name to my children. However, this book has gotten me thinking deeper. I don't want to do it because society tells me I have to. I come from a family of divorce, he comes from a family of divorce....statistically we are screwed. The stubborn part of me wants to get married because I want to do it better than my family have done it. My mum, aunties, nanna...I come from a long line of divorced women who have no need for a man yet continually search for blissful, fairy tale, childhood love. The romantic in me wants to fairytale story 'we met in high school and haven't been apart since'. However, the cynic in me tells me to run from the institution which has lead to so many miserable lives.

Anyways, back to my point. The girls I met (one engaged and one married) were shocked that I don't care for a 'wedding' itself. I don't care for the big party, the dress, the flowers. All I see is a day which is send me broke (or my parents broke) and lead to me becoming a crazy bridezilla. The wedding day to me means nothing. Honestly, I would rather not do anything at all. I would rather just go sign papers and make it happen than spend months planning. Again back to the romantic in me wants to pretty pictures on a beach in Bali look blissful with my favourite 10 or so people in the world. Thats right, I only want something small, intimate and private for my 'big day'.

So before I end this brief blog with a quote I would like to say, sorry for the marriage talk again. My life is mind numbing stressful and over the top at the moment so I immerse myself in my recreational reading. So below, a quote from 'Committed' by Elizabeth Gilbert. I love her frank observation of marriage- she reminds me a lot of myself. However, I do love the idea that my life is going to go against the statistic. I would like to think I am going in to marriage eyes wide open; educated, self-reliant and independent. Purely marrying because I want to, not because I need to. I guess, everyone wants to think their love story is 'different' and 'special'.

'The age of the couple at the time of their marriage seems to be the most significant consideration. The younger you are when you get married, the more likely you are to get divorced later. If fact, two or three times more likely to get divorced.

When we are very young, we tend to be more irresponsible, less self aware, more careless, and less economically stable than when we are older. Therefore, we should not get married when we are very young. This is why 18 years old newlyweds do not have a 50% divorce rate; they have something like a 75% divorce rate, which totally blows the curve for everyone else. Age 25 seems to be a magic cut off point...couples who marry before that age are exceptionally more divorce prone that couples who wait till they are 26 or older'

So I pose this question to all you people who have been engaged since they were 17; do you want to become a statistic? I always thought I wanted to marry as young as possible, now on the other hand, since reading this quote....I am happy to wait!